I was going to start by “it’s this time of year again” but I think that’s what Betty said last year, so message to self, try to be more original in introductions to reviews – ok.
Betty also won’t “go on” about the bands she saw, or missed “back” in the “day” (zzz); suffice to say she has been around the block a few times with the annual NME tour, and has the diseases to prove it, but we won’t talk about that…
As usual Betty missed the first act, traditionally they usually go on to be the most successful and famous, so if Azalia Banks becomes a worldwide superstar (and Betty has not heard a note of her music so has no opinion) Betty missed her here first… as usual.
Instead Betty walks, or totters, (these heels are a real bastard in the icy weather, nearly upended myself again today, but essential for the other job) into the venue a song or so into Tribes’ (punctuation police alert) set. They are young, attractive, but generic and the ghosts of Borrell (never, ever, wear a trilby onstage unless you are a ska band or ageing diva, or Leonard Cohen, special dispensation from fashion police, and jazz police, much respect Len, in the top 10 at 68 ye olde f***er), Suede (not a bad thing I suppose) and Docherty (enough with the hats) stalk the stage – an acoustic number really is completely shit, sorry guys, although the second from the end song exudes a bit more menace and drama, they may (just may) (yes, just may) have potential, and the crowd was pretty enthusiastic, some people definitely here to see them specifically, so we’ll see, but overall a bit flat for Betty.
And so to Metronomy, with a Mercury-nominated album under their belts (I think) – they took the stage and everything became a bit mental. This event has always been about tapping into what “the kids” are into whatever year it is, and Betty was concerned about not getting served at the bar due to being “too old” – but that anti wrinkle cream does do wonders and the push-up does help, not saying what was pushed up but anyway…
The place erupted and in all my years at the O2 I have never previously seen a massive conga – well now I have… 80s rave influences, some quirky keyboards, a massively heavy bass guitar, all helped to raise the roof and there was some serious moshing, surfing etc – will not even try to tell you what songs were played, look it up, some from English Riveria tracks and some older ones I think. The current Glasgow crowd anthem “Here we here we here we fucking go” was heard before pretty much everything they played. The last one was pure guitar noise mayhem and the audience was hysterical, had to check again that Betty had not gone to see One Direction by mistake, if only (adjusts gusset).
As if this was not enough, the headliners Two Door Cinema Club played an absolute blinder – the crowd were even more up for it, if that could be possible, and they did not disappoint. The riffs, the timing, the singing, everything was absolutely spot on, only thing Betty was concerned about was that the crowd were actually creating big f***ing spaces where people would then slam against each other (like pre-arranged wrestling matches), all in the best possible humour but if someone went down, someone could get killed. As a parent, Betty was thinking there would be some mums nursing the heads and split lips with the frozen peas tonight, but I am getting old, no-one got killed but just did not think that security had any control tonight, all consenting adults; but no, actually, some of them were U16 and management has a responsibility to make sure no one got killed so thank f*** nobody did.
TDCC played most of the faves (and yes Betty’s dancing moves were observed as a bit OTT, put them away etc, but I’m proud of them, my car keys that is, you naughty boys) – anyone that has bothered to read as far as this has to obtain the album, but they were even better live. They played several new songs (midway into recording second album) and seemed very chuffed with the reaction – from County Down, they are now massive and will Betty reckons will storm it on the festival circuit this summer, and deservedly so.
And yes, after the gig, went past that role just waiting for me, the concerned parents picking the kids up after the gig, oh F::@@Pp:P that is scary, give it a few years. And yes I did tell a bunch of teenage girls that the unmarked car was not a taxi, and be careful, oh god I am turning into Joan Burnie…
Can’t say too much more, just that ye olde NME tour, like Betty, there is life in the old dog yet.