10 pop songs which made it to number one in the noughties, but didn’t actually suck.
The demise of the singles charts has been much discussed in recent years – but the recent Rage Against the Machine/X Factor kerfuffle shows that, even if people are buying less singles, they still have
some passing care what tops the charts.
The last decade has seen a hell of a lot of crap do that.
But, every so often, amongst the piles of Westlife, the inexplicable popularity of the Black Eyed Peas and the tonnes of X Factor contestants, a gem makes it through.
This isn’t necessarily the type of music itm? usually focuses on (although, by the way, the only Scottish acts I remember seeing on the list were Sandi Thom and Leon Jackson, so the less said about that the
better. Oh and Calvin Harris. But he’s alright).
But seeing as it’s Christmas, I’m going to indulge in some shiny pop hits – one for each year.
2000 – Destiny’s Child – ‘Independent Women Part 1’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9NgtAYaLxc
Question! The Charlie’s Angels-themed video is just TOO much crazy CGI, Independent Women was just the sweet beginning of a Beyoncé-dominated decade.
2001 – Kylie Minogue – ‘Can’t Get You Out Of My Head’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rfr9bhSmfXc
Ice cool vocals! Crazy costumes! Dance routines! And that white jumpsuit thing. Nine years later it’s difficult to remember how interesting and fresh this sounded at the time. But, it’s still filling the dancefloors, so who am I to argue?
2002 – Sugababes – ‘Freak Like Me’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGSajAGg9h4
Back when the Sugababes were young and optimistic, and had only had one line-up change. It seems so long ago that this genius piece of alchemy, mixing Gary Numan, the new ‘Babe being initiated in a vampire video, and Richard X, basically showed everyone *how* to do a proper pop tune.
2003 – Beyonce ft Jay Z – ‘Crazy in Love’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6HPJJjqvG0
HORNBLAST UH-OH-UH-OH-UH-OH-Ohnono HORNBLAST. There’s just something about this absolute thumper of a track that seems to catch you every time you hear it – even though it’s been overplayed to death. Has to be a serious contender for Song of the Decade.
Honorable mention to Will Young for ‘Leave Right Now’ – one of few reality contestants who doesn’t come across as a total cock.
2004 – Usher – ‘Yeah’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiXbRBS5Z58
Usher might be one of the most despisable popstars I can think of. For one about half of his songs seem to deal with making excuses for being a slimy cheating pig. And for another, they’re usually so massively boring that you fall asleep listening. But ‘Yeah’ has to be the exception. The synthy introduction alone is tremendous, slick, perfection, and I’ll even forgive the fact that it introduced Crunk to a wider audience.
2005 – Arctic Monkeys – ‘I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xm69M3jtZl4
To be honest I think 2005 was one of the weaker years. This is the year when X Factor reject Steve Brookstein (Who? Yeah exactly), Tony Christie’s ‘Amarillo’, The Crazy Frog, and James Fucking Blunt were topping the charts. Ouch. Worth mentioning is Oasis’ ‘The Importance of Being Idle’, which I think is about the only good song they’ve actually done this decade, and the fact that three Elvis Presley
singles got to number one (after they reissued them all) – although it doesn’t seem fair to put The King up on this list.
So it’s not hard to see why the Arctic Monkeys would stand out. Much like Kylie, it’s hard to remember that this song was actually pretty exciting on first listen – but it’s still breathless, frantic fun now.
2006 – Justin Timberlake – ‘Sexy Back’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvfZDJzwEXI
2006 also had some true clangers hitting the top spot. But luckily here was Timbaland to the rescue. He’s been behind so many of this decade’s decent pop songs and this one, with pretty Justin bringing
sexy back (whatever the hell that means), was pretty much unstopable.
Honorable mention goes to another Timbaland vehicle – Nelly Furtado’s ‘Maneater’.
2007 – Robyn with Kleerup – ‘With Every Heartbeat’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vfLvZCdT9g
2007, on the other hand, was a bit of a pop vintage with kinda awesome things like Rihanna’s ‘Umbrella’ and Kanye West’s ‘Stronger’. But this one pips it because of a simple but really amazing delivery from
Robyn. There’s no great overblown fuss to the song, but the refrain “and it hurts with every heartbeat” is heartbreakingly direct.
2008 – Dizzeee Rascal ft Calvin Harris and Chrome – ‘Dance Wiv Me’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GibLntdLiJA
Any supporter of independent labels has to smile at this triumph, released on Dizzee’s own Dirtee Stank after XL thought it wasn’t a good bet for a single. Bet they’re gutted now. Honorable mention goes
to Katy Perry’s ‘I Kissed a Girl’ because I think she’s awesome.
‘Hot’n’Cold’ is actually a much better song but it never got to number one. Neither did ‘Single Ladies’ by Beyoncé. Sad times.
2009 – David Guetta and Kelly Rowland – ‘When Love Takes Over’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zudbz4hOcbc
I don’t care who disagrees, this is a blast of a song from the delicate plinky piano “it’s complicated, it always is” intro, to the euphoric soaring chorus, to the “tonight, tonight, tonight” bit.
Honorable mention to Tinchy Stryder ft N Dubz – ‘Number 1’. I’m not down with the kids but I like to pretend I could be because I enjoy this song so much.